SS 013 Rage Monster

Standing Stronger Podcast episode numero 13. That's right, it keeps getting better baby, what's up? Welcome back to the Standing Stronger Podcast. Whoa, episode 13. 13. That's crazy. My name's Shannon. And I'm Shannon. Yeah, we have the same name. Whatever, who cares. Welcome back. We have an exciting episode planned out for you guys today. I think it's going to be good. Yeah, I'm excited about it. I'm excited about it too. My wife has had an amazing day today because she went and bought props. So she's excited about that. Yeah, I mean not just like randomly bought props. We're doing a photo shoot with a little girl tomorrow.

So I'm really excited to get her little Christmas and one year photos done for her mommy. So I'm excited. Yeah, so we also do a little bit of photography here and there. So we're doing a shoot. Actually, we're doing two photo shoots tomorrow. And she went and bought some props and some cool stuff. Yeah, it was neat. It was neat stuff. So yeah, man, I really can't believe it's episode 13 already. I know. That means 13 weeks, right? Time flies when you're having fun. Don't you know? Don't you know? So we have a couple of important announcements. This week, or today, is the last day to submit your review. So if you would like to enter our contest, well, it's not the last day to submit a review.

However, it is the last day for the contest. So if you would like to submit a review for the contest, all you need to do is go to standingstronger.com forward slash contest. That will take you to the page. That will show you everything you need to do to rate, subscribe, and leave a written review for the Standing Stronger podcast. Now, what that means is when next week on our podcast, we're going to draw five names out of a hat. And you contact us and we will send you a Standing Stronger shirt absolutely free on us. Yay! Just for saying, hey, thanks for leaving the review. And you will love it. Yeah, it's pretty cool. It's a nice shirt. Our Patreons already, we have two that have them. Yeah.

And they love them. Yeah, they're sporting them around town. So be prepared. They're going to ask you what it is. Yes. So today we're talking about anger and the rage monster that lives within. Yes. This has been real in our lives for a long time. And even current, you know, goes on and on and on. Not just with you, but myself. Right. I don't get angry very often. But when I do, watch out. Yeah, you better watch out. Watch out! I call her Rambo sometimes. I'm like, watch out! She will mess you up. I, however, on the other hand, have always struggled with rage my entire life. I've been a very angry person. My son, as horrible as this may sound, he used to call me the Incredible Hulk.

You'd ask him why you called me the Incredible Hulk and he would say, because you have big muscles and you're angry. Yeah. I'm like, I don't know what to say about that. So, you know, he's three years old, coloring pictures of the Incredible Hulk, saying, that's my dad because he has big muscles and he's angry. Right. I'm like, man. He's very observant. Yeah. So I've worked really hard on my anger and my rage. So, you know, that's what we're going to talk about today. Yeah, I always find it really important to know what they mean because I'm that definition person. I always want to know what a word means. I tell Shannon all the time he makes up words.

So I always have to look them up to know exactly, make sure you're using it in the right context and so forth. So we looked up what anger and rage mean. And anger is a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility. In my case, it's usually hostility. Right. And rage is violent, uncontrollable anger. Oh, well, rage sounds more like me. I fall more in this category. Let's just skip anger. We'll go right to rage. You know, and I guess if your anger is so deep, it can become violent, you know. Yeah, I wasn't a violent person like, you know, beat my wife and my kids or something. I just, man, I was an angry, angry individual. You had an angered heart.

Right, I had a very hardened and angered heart, that's for sure. And it's because of what happened to me as a kid and I never told anyone. So I took that frustration out, that pent up frustration that I never told anyone. And, you know, it came out in anger and in rage. And there was times where, oh, I don't know if I should tell this story because it will put me in the doghouse. Can I tell this story? I don't know. We did not plan this. This might not be a good idea on your side. I don't know. All right, I'm going to tell this story. Oh, boy. So one time, this was... What is it regarding? No, our son was almost two. Or no, just turned two, actually. Or maybe just one. I don't know.

However, we were getting ready to go to Jacksonville to visit our in-laws, her parents, for Thanksgiving. And something happened. I forget what happened, but, man, I flipped a lid. I got angry. And I freaked out. I went and grabbed a metal chair. And at the time, we were living with my parents because I was going to firefighter school. And I grabbed a metal chair, go out into the middle of the road, and I start slamming the metal chair into the concrete in the middle of the road. Well, at the time, we had a dog. And our dog's name was Gruden. And Gruden, seeing that, got scared and took off. And I still have not found... My wife still has not forgiven me. No, I won't ever. For that.

That was my favorite animal in the world. Yeah, I messed up. He got scared, took off. However, we had to leave because we were going to Thanksgiving to the in-law's house, my wife's parents. And I'm like, don't worry, he's going to come back. He's going to come back. It's not going to be an issue. My mom and dad are here. They'll let him in. It's going to be fine. Well, we get back and the dog's nowhere to be found. We put, you know, plaster pictures and posters and a reward. If I had Facebook, then that would have been a helpful hint. I should plaster it now. I know. And we never found him. However, that was the result of me getting extremely angry and, you know, just out of control.

Yeah, I think you're sleeping on the couch again tonight. I shouldn't have brought it up. I knew I shouldn't have brought it up. However, you know, that was what? That was, yeah, seven, eight years ago. Jordan's going to be nine. So about seven years ago. Right. Yeah, I can't believe that. That was a good dog. Yeah. Anyways, we have to move on because I can't get stuck on that subject. All right. That anger will come out. Talk about anger. Let's bring it on out in her. Yeah. And, you know, for me, the emotion of anger usually comes from the disappointment in something due to an expectation that you've set.

So, you know, I know you've met with someone's mentoring you and a good way it was put was we're human and we're going to disappoint people. Right. I mean, everybody is going to disappoint somebody along the way. And because you set an expectation of how something or someone should be. Right. And then you get disappointed, you know, and is it fair to say you shouldn't expect set expectations? What would you think about that? Well, you know, if you set an expectation, it's your expectation. And if someone doesn't live up to that expectation, you know, that's not their expectation of themselves. That's your expectation of them. Right.

So, you know, when it comes to expectations, my wife and I have really, we say, you know what, we don't expect that. For example, if we loan money to someone, we make the conscious decision that if we loan the money to the person, we do not expect it back. So it's not a loan. We're giving it as a gift. We give it as a gift. So if someone wants to pay us back, that's great. However, we've found if we give someone money with the expectation that they're going to pay it back and they do not pay it back, then, you know, a relationship's ruined. You get angry and everything else.

So we decided, you know what, if anyone ever asks us money and we feel like we're in the position to help them, yes, we will help them. We'll help them with a gift. And we'll tell them, listen, here you go. If you want to pay us back, you're more than happy to. However, we don't expect it. So that keeps us from ruining a relationship over something as petty and as simple as money. So that's one of the reasons how we control the expectation. But with me, I was disappointed by someone and held deep, you know, held it deep. And to the point where, here's another example.

When my wife had brain surgery, I felt like, you know, my friends that, you know, could have been there or should have been there weren't there. And I was disappointed because Shannon had brain surgery. You know, I'm fighting in the long run. Well, now I have a group of, you know, 10 friends that, you know, are like family to me. And I'm glad that I didn't allow that to happen. However, another situation happened and I swore, well, I love God, I have a relationship with God, but I'll never step foot in a church again. I'll never give a dime to a church again because I had expectations, those expectations weren't fulfilled and I got angry and I had a whole hardened heart.

And the mentor that I'm actually meeting with now, Pastor Coates, we were talking and he was saying, you know, a church is full of people. And guess what happens with people? People make mistakes. People aren't perfect. And if you set expectations that are your expectations, guess what? You're on a road to get disappointed because it's not their expectations for themselves. It's your expectation for them. And if you think someone's not ever going to disappoint you, you are going to be disappointed. And when that disappointment comes, you're going to be angry because you think it shouldn't happen. However, that person wasn't intentionally trying to hurt you.

That person simply made an error that you think was a mistake, but may not even have been a mistake in their eyes. So, you know, it's one of those things. You set an expectation for someone. They don't live up to it. It leads to anger. So the best solution in that sense, I guess, is like what my wife and I do. We don't set an expectation. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, it doesn't. Yeah, I think we try not to set expectations, but I still think subconsciously you do. Yeah, everyone does. You know, because you're thinking, okay, well, this is the situation, and this is grand, and this is how we're going along, and, you know, everything's great.

But then something happens, and then you go, well, that's not supposed to be that way. Right. We've went off on a tangent. This isn't even on our notes. So anyways, yeah, we will get back on schedule there. But, you know, just remembering that, you know, your anger can lead to rage, and that's not a good place to go. No, never. So one of the stories I came across while we were researching this says, an old Cherokee told his grandson, my son, there is a battle between two wolves inside us all. One is evil. It is anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies, and ego. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy, and truth.

The boy thought about it and asked his grandfather, well, which wolf wins? And the old man quietly replied, the one you feed. Booyah. Booyah. That's by an unknown author, but how wise. That is profound. Remember, I told you, if we ever say something that is profound, you will know because we will tell you that is profound. Booyah. Yeah, so that's profound there. What are you feeding on every day? I know for me with the rage, it's because I fed that rage. I would sit in my car gripping white knuckles with my teeth gritted and just playing these scenarios in my head of the worst case scenarios, you know, and I'm going to do this and I'm going to do that and I'm going to make them pay.

You know, just ridiculous stuff goes through your head. Right, so we were saying out of that story, how do you feed evil? And a couple of things that we came up with, like you just mentioned, is creating your own story, you know, and the direction something's going to go. You don't even know the direction. You've just created this scenario. Right. And you talk about it with the wrong people to add fuel to the fire. Yeah, you talk to a negative person about your problems, guess what? They are going to fire those problems up. They're not going to try to talk reason into you. They're going to try to flame those or fuel those flames to make it even bigger than it actually is.

I don't think it just has to be a negative person, though. It could just be someone. Sometimes things will happen. For instance. We have a perfect situation about this. We have a couple that we're best friends with and we always laugh because my husband and his wife could never be married. They're exactly alike. This world wouldn't know what to do. They wouldn't know how to handle a Jenna and a Shannon in the same household. And a Rick and a Shannon wouldn't get very far either. Zero compassion on our end. We are just who we are. But big Shannon and Jenna can be very explosive people and they don't necessarily think everything through. So when a situation can happen.

Can you believe that happened? No one can believe that was horrible. I know it's just the worst thing ever. What are we going to do about it? Right. We're going to make them pay. We've had a discussion where, you know, Jenna will want to see that emotion come from Rick that Shannon could have, you know, of the outrage and I'm going to rip their head off, you know, but that's not who Rick is. And that's not who I am because we are realistic people. You got to have a counterbalance there. Right. And in both of our relationships, we definitely counterbalance.

So knowing that in anything that happens for him or happens for her, they are the wrong people to call because they're not going to be wise counsel. No, listen, my friend Rick, he's one of my best friends. And when something happens, I call him and his response is like my wife. And I'm like, I'm calling your wife. Right. But that's because you want someone to fuel your fire. I'm like, get fired up. Let's get angry. Right. You want, you're looking for someone to fuel that fire. You want someone to agree with you to condemn the way that you feel at that moment. And that's not always wise counsel. That's not the right. Rick always gives me the wise counsel.

I'm like, this is not the counsel I want. I'm calling your wife and we're getting it fired up. He's like, if I wanted Rick's advice, I would have just talked to my own wife. Talk to him beyond that. But just remembering that just because someone is your best friend, you know, or you want them to just agree with you is not the counsel you should seek all the time. Right. So that's how you feed evil. Now, how do you feed good? Yeah, that's a good question. And the first one is, do not call the person that you know is going to fuel the fire, but you want to seek that wise counsel.

You know, there are people in your life that you know will feed the fire that will throw fuel on it because that's just their personality. That's not the person you need to be calling whenever you're angry because they're going to fuel it just to make you even more angry. And it's not like a lot of times, like in the case we were just talking about, it's not because they're bad people or they want to fuel the fire. It's just their personality, their passion. Well, they have the same emotion and passion that you would have over that subject. Exactly. So they might not see the other side as clearly because they would feel the same way you feel in that circumstance. Exactly.

And then what else would you do? Well, I think when you are seeking that wise counsel, it's not just someone that is wise. I mean, everybody's wise in different areas, so you need to make sure you're directing this to a specific person. You know, just because I think you're wise, you might not know anything about the subject I need counseling on. Right. So you want to seek out someone that's going to be able to help you. So in terms of in my situation, you know, I couldn't just go and talk to a friend. I had to seek professional help because, I mean, my anger ran deep. So the wise counsel I had to seek was not just a friend. It was an actual Christian counselor.

I went and talked to them, tried to get all those underlying problems dealt with and figured out because this leads us perfectly into our next point, and this is by an unknown author as well, but it says where there is anger, there is always underneath pain. Yeah. So whenever there's anger, there's some type of pain that's lying deep, deep inside of you. In my case, I was molested as a kid, and I held on to that anger and that pain for such a long time, and it ultimately manifested into an attempted suicide. But leading up to that, I can't even count how many fights I was in.

I mean, I can't even recall, and I can't recall how many times I put my fists through a wall or I hit a cabinet or I slammed metal chairs into the ground, you know. I took a couch and flipped it over. You know, so many examples just of that underneath hidden pain, and it wasn't because I was angry at that situation. I was just angry inside because of what happened, and I didn't know how to deal with it. You know, it's that underlying anger that brought that rage to the forefront. Right, and there's a couple of questions that we were talking about that will help you figure out where that underneath pain is coming from or that anger, you know. Ask yourself, where does the anger generate from?

You might not realize the anger that you have isn't even from the situation you're faced at that moment. It could have been, like you said, buried beneath something. It might not be as deep as what yours was. There could be other things going on that you just mentally don't realize are there, but it's fueling your anger because you have kept it underneath. A classic example would be someone that's not happy at home. The marriage is struggling. Take it on their kids. They take it on their kids or they go to work and they get fired up at work because the home life just isn't where it should be.

That's a perfect example of how that underlying fear, or that underlying anger, where is it generating from? It's not that you're mad at the guy at work that ate your sandwich out of the refrigerator. That would make me mad. That's happened before at my old job. We would put signs on the... Do not eat my stuff. Dear friend that ate my sandwich. Where is it really generating from? If you sit down and think about it, most of the time you can figure that out. Really, who or what are you really angry at? You need to find out and confront that before you can start moving forward. Figure that out before you start taking it out on the wrong people.

Now again, my husband has never laid a hand on me, my child, our children. We have children now. It's crazy. So no matter the rage or anger he ever went through, it was never put on us. Thankfully, we were not physically abused, nothing like that. There are situations where those people suffer from that. My husband has never done that. However, because of the built-up anger, we got the backlash from it. I had a very short fuse. You asked me a question, I was like, what? Right. Very quick-tempered. You didn't really know the person you were getting. Was he happy? Is he sad? Is he upset? Are we good to go? And then that could change in the flip of a hat.

So understanding that you don't want to take it out on the wrong people. And there was another quote, and I can't say it directly, but think about what you are saying because once those words are said, you can't ever take those back. Whether you mean them or not, that person is, it's going to take a lot for them to say, I know you don't truly feel that way. Right. Right? Yeah. I mean, plenty of times I'm sure I had to say, I know you don't feel that way. Right. You're just angry and wanted to make me as upset as what you were at that point. And so to do that, it was to say whatever hurtful thing you could say. But I learned to realize there's something else going on. Yeah.

And in my case, that's exactly what it was. If I was feeling pain, I would try to transition that pain through words, and I would say mean and hurtful things. And I want to say I never did it to my son, but I guess I really, I don't think I did, but still just yelling and coming down on him so hard and expecting so much of him, you know, it was all because, you know, I was hurting inside. And as simple as him coming in my office asking me a question, like, Dad, can we play catch? And I freak out, get out of my office. You know, it was ridiculous. And I'm glad to say that I'm a totally different person now.

And it took a lot of work and a lot of counseling and a lot of tears and a lot of prayers. The biggest thing, prayers and getting down on my knees and asking God for help. But now the fuse isn't quite as short. No, it's not. And not everyone is going to be as weak or as strong as we have been in situations. So you might be going through something and this might be hitting home right now of, you know, oh, I do that to this person or this situation. Believe me, you need to start changing your ways because I can't say everybody is like myself. I know. I married the perfect person because everyone else would have divorced me 17 times by now.

And, you know, we would have never even gotten married if it was someone else. Yeah. However, she somehow- That's very true. She somehow learned to look past all of my, you know, faults and seen the amazing person deep down inside of me, which is great. Right. I'm lucky. You're just, I wouldn't want anybody, the reason we do this podcast is to help you before you get to the points that we've been through. And if you're there, how to come down from them. Right. Because, man. You got to get through it. We were talking to my friend during Halloween and I was explaining a situation to him. And my wife and I was talking and she was like, when he was telling you, what were you thinking?

He was like, oh, my gosh. What more can this guy be going through? Right. I told him, don't you wish sometimes he would just call another friend? Right. You know. But, you know, you have those people that God has put in your life and they're there for a reason to help you through and lean on that. But you got to help yourself. Right. You know, and. The funny thing, I just got to tell this story because it's hilarious. I never told anyone about what had happened to me when I was young. I told Shannon, well, I lied. I told Shannon when I was 27 years old and she yelled at me. And I never told a single person ever. And I was to the point where, I mean, I was really, really depressed.

It's where I was thinking about suicide each and every day, you know, all day long. And I knew, you know, consciously I knew it's because it was just tearing me up, the secret that I was keeping. And finally, you know, I was with my friend. We were at the park. We were playing ball. And after we got done playing basketball, I'm like, listen, I want to tell you something. He looks at me and he could tell it was deep just by my demeanor and my attitude and everything. He's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a minute. I don't know if I want to know this. I don't know if you, I don't think, I don't know if I want you to tell me. But I told him anyway.

But I always thought that was funny because he's like, hold on. Right. I don't know if you should be telling me this. But, you know, at the end of the day, you can't hang on to that anger because if you do hang on to that anger, our next quote is by Buddha, which is really good. And, babe, why don't you tell them what that quote by Buddha is? It is holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. What? When she was actually doing the research for these quotes and she read that quote to me, I'm like, wow, that's wow. At the time, she's like, I think that's another unknown author. And then she's like, no, it's Buddha.

I'm like, well, we can't use that because we're supposed to be those Christian people. We can't quote Buddha. And she said, we will quote whoever we want because we're people. Real people. Real people. No, I'm just playing. We didn't say that. However, we didn't say that. I just make up random stories. But I tell the truth right afterwards, so it's not a lie. He's always been good at telling them. So, yeah, Buddha, he said, holding on to anger is like drinking poison, expecting the other person to die. Man, isn't that? That is powerful. I've done it. Yeah. I've done it so many times. I just did it this past week. And I'm not an angry person, y'all. I do not. I'm not an angry person.

I can let a lot of things go. But when you get me going, it's hard for me. So I think I told you or my sister. I said, I don't like feeling like Shannon. It must have been my sister. But it's just that situation. You get a heart in heart. You're disappointed in yourself or another situation. And, man, it really is. And the more, if you're still thinking about it, it still has a hold on you. And you can't live like that. Yeah, man, I've let situations, man, just fester in my mind. And when she read that, it was just so true because you're not hurting that person by holding on to that anger. Absolutely not. That person probably has moved on. And hasn't even thought about it.

Or the situation is over. You can't change it. It is what it is. And it's consuming your life. I mean, the perfect example, you've heard it maybe 100 times. If you listen to any type of motivational podcast, you've heard it 100 times. It's like the person that cuts you off in traffic. Sure. For the next two hours, you're fuming mad. You've told everyone. When it happens, you're flipping them to bird. You're screaming. You're yelling. Your knuckles are white. You're gritting your teeth. You get to work. You walk in. You'll never believe this jerk that cut me off. Then at lunch, talking about this jerk. I can't believe it. He probably got in an accident down the road. I hope he did.

And that's a horrible thing to say. However, how many people have said it or thought it? Well, and you don't even know the other person. Exactly. The other person could have been an emergency one. They didn't even see you. They didn't even When you're not even a thought in their mind, so I still have to work on that one very hard. And it's one thing that if I would say my biggest struggle, that is it. Forgiveness. Forgiveness and letting go and letting go of that anger. Forgiveness has to happen. Forgiveness to yourself. Forgiveness to others. Forgiveness to that situation. You know, and to do that, it takes a lot of work. It really does.

I mean, you have to come to a point in your life where you start realizing you have to forgive people. And the Bible talks about that. The Bible talks, if you don't forgive someone, how do you expect God to forgive you? Right. That's powerful in itself right there. You know, I mean, you hold on to the anger and it's like drinking poison, expecting the other person to die. Well, you don't forgive your brother or sister. Guess what? One day, it's all going to be over. Right. And you're going to have to answer for that. You know, and the Lord talks about that. It's important. Treat others like you like to be treated. Would you like someone to hold on to the anger of a mistake you made? Sure.

Something silly, you know. And know everybody. As much as my husband will sit here and say to everyone that I'm a perfect person, I'm not a perfect person. No, I say you're the closest thing to perfect there is. And it's the truth. And that's a lot to live up to because I'm not even remotely close. I had a situation last week and he was telling his friend about it and he's like, yep, Miss Perfect. She lost her cool. You know, again, it takes a lot for that to happen for me. But everyone has a tipping point. Everyone, nobody is perfect. You're going to mess up. You're going to fall. You're going to disappoint someone. But don't let that disappointment define who you are. Right.

So we've come up with a couple tips to help release anger. So we'll talk about those here for a few minutes. We're over our time limit already, so we'll try to go through them fairly quickly. But the first is pray about it. What's funny is I had that last on the list and I said that has to be number one because you cannot do anything else that's going to make a situation right without praying about it first. Truly believe that. What does the Bible say? Lean not on your own understanding. And you've got to submit your request to God. This is one verse that I always leaned on whenever I was going through my depression and coming out of it is don't be anxious about anything.

But in everything through prayer and petition, submit your request to God. And coming through my depression, anger, panic attacks, anxiety, I mean all this stuff that was going through, I spent lots of time on my knees. I mean I remember one night crying at my desk in the middle of the night, 2 o'clock in the morning, listening to Matthew West, I'm Not Strong Enough, just crying and reaching out to God. And I'm not strong enough. Help me. I can't do this on my own. And I couldn't. I could not do it on my own. And through the amazing power of God and through the love of my wife and my mom and my family, my sister, I was able to overcome this.

But it all started by getting down on my knees and submitting to God and saying I can't do it alone. Help me. Right. So that's number one. Pray about it. Number two. Respond instead of react. Yes. Now the situation Shannon had, if she would have responded to the situation instead of reacted to the situation, it would have been a totally different situation. However, I will say I was that person. She called me for advice. And, you know, I fueled the fire. I'm like, that's crazy. That's ridiculous. Here's what you need to do. You're right. Dang it. Why didn't I call Rick? Right. That was not wise counsel. Just kidding. I don't know what you're thinking.

But, you know, I helped her react to the situation instead of respond to the situation. And, you know, one of my favorite motivational speakers is Zig Ziglar. I love the guy. And he's done amazing things for me even though I've never met him in person. And one of my favorite stories is when he goes to the airport. And the lady at the airport says, well, sir, your flight's going to be delayed for two hours. And he's like, fantastic. And she smiles at him. She's like, fantastic, huh? How is that fantastic? And he said, well, you know, there's only a couple reasons why that plane isn't flying. That plane isn't flying because either the pilot is not able to fly that plane.

And if the pilot is not able to fly that plane, I do not want to be in that plane. Or the weather is not conducive for that plane to be flying in the air. So I do not want to fly in that plane. Or there is a malfunction in the mechanics of the plane that is preventing it from getting up in the air. Therefore, I do not want to be in that plane. Fantastic. You know, because you have and behind him, everyone's fuming. They're stomping their feet. They're slapping their ticket against their hand. They're ready to cause a storm. They're ready to react to the situation instead of responding to the situation.

And my wife is good at this as well because if we're ever late, if we're ever running behind, if we're ever rushed, one of the things that sets me off is being rushed. Hates it. If I'm rushed, I mean, it overwhelms me because I have sensory type of issues. But anyway. Feel bad for me, y'all. Feel bad for me. So if I'm rushed, I get overwhelmed and I get angry. And my wife is good. She's like, listen, there's a reason why we're not on the road now. There could be an accident. There could be whatever the reason is, is we're in the right spot right now. And she helps me out with that. So you've got to respond to the situation instead of react to the situation. Right.

And number three is refocus negative energy on something positive like working out or yoga. Just breathing. Get your blood pumping. Right. And the biggest thing about this is repositioning your body. If you ever notice, whenever you're angry, what happens? Your shoulders tend to collapse in on themselves. Your fists tighten. You look down at the ground. You grind your teeth. All of these things promote anger. So what you need to do is refocus that energy. You pull your shoulders back. You stand up straight. You look tall. You look straight ahead. You smile. You go and you accomplish something. Breathe. Meditation. Prayer. Yoga. Me lifting weights.

My son makes fun of me because I'm a brawl when I'm lifting weights. I make lots of noise. But it's just because I'm letting that negativity out through the process of lifting weights. And number four is talk about it with wise counsel and then let it go. Don't let it control you or define who you are. Let it go. Let it go. I knew you were going to sing that. I don't know the rest of the words. That's all I know. Right. So let's recap. We have pray about it, respond instead of react, refocus your negative energy, and talk about it with wise counsel and let it go. That's right. Check yourself before you wreck yourself. So think about your anger. Anger and rage is bad for your health. It is.

It's no good to have a hardened heart, you guys. Just really need to work on that and focus on it and refocus that energy. Yeah. Give it to God. You got to give it up. Can't keep it inside because if you keep it inside, you know, that's what led me to doing what I did is I kept it inside. I didn't tell anyone. So if you're struggling right now, if you feel like there's just nothing you can do, the first step, I would suggest, not listen to us. Step one is... Step one is we are not smart counsel. Do not listen to Shannon and Shannon. We're not doctor, psychiatrist, psychologist, anything of the sorts. We have no education in this stuff.

We're just two people that went through it trying to share our experience with you. So find someone that can help you. Christian counselors who I suggest because they're going to help you in a way I think that will really help you. So number two, remember to submit your review so you can get into the contest. And also, we want to remind you of a free report we have. It's three tips that I use to stop depression and anxiety dead in its tracks. And you go to standingstronger.com, standingstronger.com. You can put your name and email address, hit submit.

That's going to give you that free report and give you those three tips that I use each and every day pretty much on how I help curb that kind of stuff. Anything other important notes before we pray? Let's pray it out. All right, dear Lord, we just thank you for the day. We thank you for this time of fellowship that we spent together. We thank you for the people that are listening, and we pray that we're doing a good job. We try our best. We pray that if someone has a hardened heart to let them realize that it's not going to help by keeping it in. It's like drinking poison and expecting something bad to happen to another person. You're just hurting yourself. And let it go.

Well, we love you God. We just thank you for the time we have and we thank you for the opportunities you've given us. You are an awesome God, a great God. Thanks and we love you. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Amen. I almost said, I almost ended the podcast right there instead of saying Amen. Thanks God. Thanks God. Peace out. Have a fantastic day. Hopefully I'll see you on the beach of the world. But anyway, listen guys, we really, we really do appreciate it and we are going to do our best to keep on bringing these podcasts to you. We will each and every day, but for now have a fantastic day. And as always, hopefully we'll see you on the beach of the world.